The Perfect Democratic Solution!

Ted and Hillary should kiss and make up, and then Ted can take Hillary for a nice drive across the bridge, and

ZINGO!

Chappa, Chappa!
Chappa, Chappa!
Chappa, Chappa!
Chappa Quidick!

What's This Flap About Bush Taking Off His Earrings?

ZING!

Clinton and McCain Are Very Close?

Bill says they are close friends?

Is Bill suggesting that, if McCain does not get the Republican nomination, he should consider switching parties so he can be her Vice President?

Is this a threesome, or what?

Zing

Bye, Bye Barack

Ted Kennedy endorsed him?

If I was Bill or Hillary, I'd have paid Ted $10,000,000 to endorse Barack!

ZING!

Too Young To Kill

He was under the legal age, so he did not understand the implications of what he was doing. Therefore, he was not culpable because there was no criminal intent. On that basis, the crime did not happen and the deceased is alive. I rest my case.

ZING!

HEY! All Of You Illegals! WAKE UP!!!!

GET OFF YOUR BUTTS! FORGET YOUR SIESTAS! HEAD FOR THE POLLS! VOTE FOR MCCAIN!

HE'LL keep this country from sending you back to Mexico!

VIVA MCCAIN!

ZING!

Republican Party Funeral Set For November

Since there are no conservatives left in the Republican Party, and since none of the front runners stands any chance whatsoever of beating either Hillary OR Barack, our next President will be chosen by ONLY the Democrats at their convention in July.

The Republican Party can eat shit and die.

No Zing, Just The Facts

Goodbye Mr. Thompson

I really did like you and thought you should stick around. But... Don't let the swingin' door hit you in the ass on the way out.

ZING!

'Tis The Season Of Politics: Snow Jobs Everywhere

Here in northern California, we got about 8 inches of snow last night, enough so that both dogs got cold wieners on their way to the bush!

'Tis too cold to Zing!

McCain Wins South Carolina?

How many votes did he get from illegals?

ZING!

What's All The Fuss About A Picture Of A Moose On The Cover Of GOLFWEEK MAGAZINE?

Oh. Now I get it. Some country clubs don't allow mooses on their golf courses?

ZING!

To A Detractor About Clinton

Upon careful evaluation of your asstoot statement by our highly qualified and professional staff, you should be reminded there are several months left before the Democratic National Convention. While our staff does concede that top Democratic Party officials and key office holders are flocking toward Obama like fleas deserting a sinking rat, and while labor and other influential organizations are also endorsing Obama, you can expect that hairsylist John Edwards and the other remaining candidates will go bye bye, leaving only Clinton and Obama in the running at convention time. But, as afraid of Clinton as they are, I don't think southern Democrats are ready for a black president and I don't think northern Democrats are ready for a black Muslim president, (study his background). Therefore, although the tide today appears in Obama's favor, the seeds of racism have been planted and they will sprout big and strong on the convention floor. So saieth the Lord Unknown Scribbler of the Twelfth and Almighty House of Prophecy.

ZING!

P.S. Whether or not she'll beat McCain remains to be seen.

If Obama Thinks Hillary's Playing Tough Now...

Wait until she's in office and he starts getting audited by the IRS.

ZING!

Writers Strike

Everyone's worried that there won't be anything worth watching on TV with the writers strike ongoing. I have over 100 channels and believe me, there wasn't anything worth watching on TV BEFORE the strike! Those guys DESERVE to be out of work! They couldn't write their collective ways out of a wet paper toilet tissue wrapper!

ZING!

Marine Officer's Defense

"So, your honor, she came over to my house thinking that I was going to propose to her. Instead, I told her it was over, that I was breaking it off for good. Man, she got really burned up over that!"

Zing!

The Zinger Endorses Candidate For President!

As long as every other Tom, Dick and Mary is endorsing someone, I figure why not?

My pick is Britney Spears. I pick her for the following outstanding characteristics, prerequisites it seems, for running for a political office:

1. Skillful liar
2. Psychotic behavior
3. Lack of morals
4. Complete absence of ethics
5. Big mouth
6. Name recognition

But, above all, she'll be a lot easier on the eyes than any of the other candidates. I can just picture her now, getting out of the Presidential limo.......

ZING!

Cause Of Britney Spears' Psychosis Revealed

Her breast implants are leaking.

Zing?

OJ Headed Back To The Can Can

Music to my ears.

Zing.

Obama Math

Washington Post reports campaign funds raised as 20,400,000, funds spent $21,500,000 and cash on hand $36,100,000 (round figures). Now, the way I read is, he's $1,100,000 short.

So, where did he get the $36,100,000 in cash?

Oh, I forgot. He's a Democrat.

ZING!

Hooters Read My Post!

They were so afraid that Hillary was going to lose and come to them for a job that they all jumped in cars, on buses, etc to rush to New Hampshire to vote for her!

And THAT's why the polls were wrong!

ZING!

Should Hillary Lose And Be Out Of Work, We Know Where She'll Never Get A Job

Hooters.

ZING, ZING, anda ZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SNOW In New Hampshire?

Somehow, I have the feeling that after all of the politicos leave New Hampshire after Tuesday's primaries, the residents there are going to be left shoveling more than snow......

ZING!

Rudy Finished Where?

What was his last name again?



ZING!

Hillary's Presidential Victory Speech Was Soooo Bad...

When she said, after her third-place finish in the Iowa primaries that, when elected President, she was going to restore America's leadership in moral leadership....

Even Brit Spears went on a bender.

ZING!