DEFINITION: "FAT CHANCE"

The odds that the Democrats will hold ethics hearings against Charlie Rangel and Maxine Waters before the elections.... or ever, for that matter. 

OKAY, EINSTEIN: FIGURE THIS ONE OUT

General Stanley McChrystal was fired by Obama for doing an interview in ROLLING STONE magazine.  Now, Obama has done an interview for... ROLLING STONE magazine.  Go figure. 

Maybe it's an immigration thing.  You know.... a Rolling Stone gathers no mas!

THE MORE I HEAR FROM NANCY PELOSI

The more she reminds me of a bird...

All mouth and no ass!        

MODERN DAY SLAVERY?

Redskin's player Albert Haynesworth says he's "not a slave." 


At $32 million a year, I don't think he's a slave. 


For $31.9 million maybe, but not $32 million. 

DO YOU THINK....

That, maybe, we should should just go ahead and impeach Bush?  

HIYA THERE, SUNSHINE!

Aren't you really pleased to no end that our recession is over and that everything is hunky-dory? 

IT'S SAFE TO DRIVE NOW

Lindsey Lohan is back in the can. 

IT HAPPENS TO ALL BAD POLITICIANS SOONER OR LATER

Over there in Nevada, Gov. Gibbons fell off his high horse...

OBAMA'S NEW DISCOVERY

The Tea Party is for real. 

OUR DAY IS COMING SOON...VERY SOON

FOR THOSE WHO SAY O'DONNELL CAN'T WIN

Back before Christine O'Donnell, there was Scott Brown. 

BILL CLINTON'S ADVICE TO OBAMA

Eeny meeny miny moe....

WHY HARRY REID IS IN TROUBLE

Sharron has a new angle.  It's called "American responsibility." 

SQUIRRELLY

Have you ever noticed that the closer you get to an election, the more squirrelly the politicians become? 

As if that were possible. 

REPUBLICAN PARTY COMMITTEE = HYPOCRITES

They dump on O'Donnell and love Steele? 

FDA GOES TOTALLY AROUND THE BEND

The FDA is about to take all over-the-counter cough medicines off the shelf because 1% of the users convert one of its ingredients to illegal drugs.  It occurs tome that ALL OTC medicines should be removed because someone somewhere will abuse them. 

(While we're at it, let's not forget to ban salt, Chevrolets, hot dogs and apple pie, too.)

DOES OBAMA HAVE A FUZZY NAVEL?

It would certainly match his fuzzy math....

IT'S NO LONGER "BLAME BUSH!"

It's... Blame Boehner. 

So, it's still Obama shuffling through the Kenyan jungle with a BB gun? 

REGARDING THE MOSQUE....

Can't you just see Osama and his radical Muslim cronies just jumping up and down in the streets with glee like they did on 9/11?

I'M NOT ANGRY AT YOU MR. PRESIDENT

I'm just flat pissed off. 

QURAN

I see that the pastor is the one who got burned...

KENYAN RUMOR

Rumor has it that the Kenyans have decided NOT to build a memorial honoring Barack Obama.  They're going to put up a memorial honoring the cuckoo bird instead.

OBAMA ON FAST TRACK

Wants to spend more money on Amtrack.

Now, that's a real winner!

OBAMA CLAIMS 90,000 JOBS CREATED IN PAST 12 MONTHS

Gosh, that's about 7,500 jobs per month, just slightly more than the number of illegal aliens crossing the border every day....

WHEN YOU BRING HOME MORE TROOPS FROM IRAQ...

You add more people to the unemployment lines. 

BARACK'S NEW IDEA FOR THE ECONOMY

STIMULUS.  Lets have a stimulus!  

I just KNEW he'd come through with a GREAT idea!

PRAY FOR HURRICANE EARL

Hope the blow hard will meander up the coast and blow the riffraff out of Washington, DC.