ZINGER'S WOMAN OF THE YEAR AWARD

WE'RE SAFE NOW

Obama's in Hawaii. 

THE RUNS

"Afluenza Teen"

OBAMA ON TERRORISM: PAY ATTENTION NOW...

Obama sez: "If you target Americans, you will have no safe haven."  

Carter says that they are going to transfer out 17 more terrorists back home from GITMO who actively tried to kill Americans and their looking for places to send another 48.  

Get the message?   
 

MISTRIAL

A trial conducted by women. 

ENCRYPTION

The communication of something between people that no one else can figure out... akin to listening to an Obama speech.  
 

OBAMA CROSSED THE RED LINE

He actually went over to the Pentagon.  Gosh, be must really be serious.  
 

RABID DOGS

Snarling, barking, biting, foaming at the mouth... Trump has the media and the Democrats so upset that they are acting like rabid dogs. 

NEW WING

Has the media most recently become the new left wing of the Democratic Party? 

WHY "THE ESTABLISMENT" DOESN'T LIKE TRUMP

They want a president they can control and who will do want they want, regardless of what America wants. 

QUESTION OF THE DAY

Do you feel as safe today as you did on the day before Obama took his oath of office?  

BODY FOR SALE---CHEAP

No one has claimed the body of Tashfeen Malik.  

"CHICKEN LITTLE" OBAMA

Obama is running around crowing in fear that Americans want to go to war against all Muslims.  

The sky is falling.  

If we don't enact ObamaCare right now, Republicans are going to start pushing crippled old ladies in wheel chairs off of cliffs.  

INCOMPTENCE 101

Barack Hussein Obama. 

OBAMA'S A WHAT?

Lt. Colonel Ralph Peters, a frequent FOX NEWS contributor, got into trouble when he said on live air the other night about Obama:  “This guy is such a total pussy, it’s stunning.”  

I guess FOX doesn't like cats; it has suspended Peters. 

"DISRESPECTFUL"

Showing an unveiled picture of the female San Bernardino terrorist.  
 

WHEN THE RUBBER MEETS THE ROAD

Way back in the beginning of time, Barack Hussein Obama said that should the political winds change, he will stand with the Muslims.  It's looking like that time has arrived.  
 

HOW THE ENEMY THINKS

Tashfeen Malik pledged her life to I.S.I.S. just before the San Bernardino attacks.  However, it was workplace violence, not terrorism; Obama and Clinton are coming for your guns.  

TWO DEGREES

We have to decrease global warming by 2 degrees centigrade or 3.6 degrees Fahrenheit.  Otherwise, we're toast.  Well, in those days when we were that much cooler, ice covered most of North America.  

I hate to tell you guys in Yuma, but the president wants you to freeze your butts off.  

 

DON'T BLAME BUSH ANY LONGER; BLAME GLOBAL WARMING

Since global warming causes terrorism, global warming has obviously been around since the beginning of time.  Global warming caused the Crusades.  Global warming caused the World Wars.  Global warming caused the rise and fall of the Roman Empire.  So sayeth the Lord of all Loonies.  

Global warming even causes Republicans to think screwy.  
 

ABOUT THE WHITE HOUSE CHRISTMAS TREE

How can they be having a Christmas tree in the White House when the White House is refusing to allow Christmas trees in veterans facilities around the country?  The thought kind of makes you hope that a lot of wild bears peed on the White House tree, doesn't it?  

OBAMA'S REASONING

When it comes to gun violence, that is not acceptable and cannot become the norm; therefore, Americans must give up their guns.  

When it comes to terrorism in the United States, we have to accept that as the norm, and deal with it without guns.  

Did Barack do LSD while he was at Columbia?  

HILLARY LIKES TERRORISTS

No one is talking about her emails anymore. 

WAR IS IMMINENT

I wonder if Obama will put boots on the ground to fight the "war" on global warming.  
 

DEAR GOD

Please keep our nation safe this holiday weekend.  Our president doesn't have those capabilities or that mindset.  

 

PICTURE OF ANGRY OBAMA

OBAMA IS NO TURKEY

HE'S A TRAITOR

 

HOW TO PREVENT U.S. TERRORISM

Let the TSA or the Secret Service handle it.  
 

CHESTER NEZ

The last of the Navajo Code Talkers has passed away.  

BOBBY JINDAL

Bye bye, now.  

PARIAH

REMEMBER THIS?

BACKGROUND CHECK

You'll find one in your next box of CRACKER JACKS.  
 

MAN GOES 12 YEARS WITHOUT SHOWERING

I think he's now in the White House. 

WAR

Global warming.  
 

LACKADAISICAL

Obama's statement of support for France in wake of Paris terrorist attack.  

PARIS THANKS OBAMA

Had we stayed in Iraq and Afghanistan, ISIS most likely would not have arisen and Paris most likely would not have been attacked.  
 

IT'S FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH

Obama's night to howl...

 

OBAMA WANTS A THIRD TERM

Let him serve it at San Quentin.  
 

AMERICA'S COMMANDER IN CHIEF

HAPPY VETERANS DAY

AND TONIGHT'S BIG LOSERS WILL BE...

George Pataki and Lindsey Graham. 

COMING SOON TO A NEIGHBORHOOD NEAR YOU?

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed.  

GEORGE WILL AND BILL O'REILLY

Kind of like watching a tempist in a teapot.  

KEYSTONE PIPELINE

Butchered by Hussein Obama's guillotine. 

IT'S SO COLD OUT

It's colder than a Pelosi tit.  
 

OBAMACARE

That big, black hole where your money went.
 

EASY DUTY

How do you defeat 30,000 I.S.I.S. terrorists and defeat Syria's Assad regime?  

Send in 50 Special Forces for training purposes.  

Yep, that'll do it. 

A FINE ACTOR, SENATOR AND GENTLEMAN

Fred Thompson would have made a fine president.  

GOOD RIDDANCE

CHARLES MANSON

WHY?

Why, in a nation of over 300 million people of which 40% are Democrats, can they only come up with the likes of Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton as candidates? 

SAY HELLO TO THE OLD BAT FOR ME

FLOP

CNBC Debates. 

TRUMP'S COMPETITION

Trump asks "What is my competition?"  

Little does he understand that his main real competition is himself. 

HE'S A REAL KNOCK OUT

Mike Tyson has endorsed Donald Trump for president.  

ON THE DARK SIDE

MAUREEN O'HARA

Who will ever forget that fiery red hair?  
 

THE GREAT ESCAPE

Hillary Rodham Clinton. 

SCREWED

Everybody in the country except Obama.  
 

WHY HAVEN'T THEY CAPTURED ANY BENGHAZI TERRORISTS?

Because they're all illegal aliens hiding out in San Francisco.  
 

HILLARY IS IN BAD TROUBLE

Since Joe announced yesterday that he's not running, she'll have to testify before Congress today with a really bad hangover.  
 

HILLARY'S CACKLE

... Is far better than any Halloween recording ever made. 

BENGHAZI NEVER HAPPENED

The Democrats are loudly singing the refrain that the House Select Committee investigating what happened at Benghazi is politically motivated... that they're solely after Clinton.  

Therefore, they further submit, Benghazi never happened and four great Americans were never massacred. 

HOW TO BREAK A MIRROR

Stand in front of it and ask: "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the greatest liar of all?  Barack or Hillary?"

MAYBE THEY KNOW SOMETHING WE DON'T

OBAMA'S RETIREMENT HOME

JACKASS FLATS

 

BOWE BERGDAHL

FOR PRESIDENT

 

OBAMA GETS TOUGH ON MIDDLE EAST

He's sending Kerry over there to straighten things out.  

 

AND LAST NIGHT'S DEBATE WINNER IS...

JOE BIDEN!!!

 

DEMOCRATS DEBATE

I understand there is to be some kind of a debate on TV tonight.  My guess is that everyone is going to be watching reruns of THE THREE STOOGES. 

IT LEAVES A VERY BAD TASTE IN YOUR MOUTH

Diet Pepsi. 

AFTER OBAMA CONFISCATES YOUR GUNS...

Some dude from Cato Township in Michigan shot and injured a cop over the weekend.  He used a crossbow. 

MEANWHILE, BACK IN ALASKA

SPEAKERLESS IN CONGRESS

John Boehner has resigned as Speaker of the House.  Kevin McCarthy decided he doesn't want the job.  Gosh, maybe Nancy Pelosi will have to take the job back???

OBAMA'S WAR STRATEGY

WHY HILLARY IS IN IMMINENT DANGER

Because Sanders is gaining on he, she's moving further to the left.  If she moves much further, she's going to fall off the face of the earth. 

THE WORLD'S MOST ENDANGERED SPECIES

White, Christian cops. 

OBAMA HAS IT RIGHT ON GUNS

We need to keep guns out of the hands of the mentally ill.  Let's start by confiscating all guns in the hands of the White House and the Congress. 

THE LAUGHING STOCK OF THE EVIL EMPIRE

NEW BEST SELLER

Now that Putin is in charge, it's a great time to study America's new best seller.  

NETANYAHU WAS RIGHT

Now that Russia rules the Middle East, just who is going to help Israel defend itself? 

WAHHHHH!!!

Putin told Obama to get out of Syria.  The commodes at the White House have backed up.  Wahhhh!!!! 

NEW V.A.PROJECT

Evidently, the waiting lines are getting bigger and bigger, and it's taking longer and longer to get into see a V.A. doctor, so guess what?  

The Department of Veterans Affairs is launching a campaign to cut down the suicide rate. 

PLANNED PARENTHOOD MARKETING STRATEGY

Why don't they just grind up fetuses and sell them for dog meat?  
 

HOW TO EXCITE A DEMOCRAT

Let Joe Biden make another gaffe.  
 

LOWER THAN A SNAKE'S BELLY

Any member of congress.  
 

QUANDRY

Trying to figure out which of the candidates would be better at working with and leading Congress to better manage our country is like trying to figure out which lunatic would be better at running the asylum. 

OBAMA SAYS THIS COUNTRY IS GREAT

Obviously, he's happy with how he has destroyed it. 

HE'S NOT FIT TO BE PRESIDENT

Barack Hussein Obama

POLITICAL PROSTITUTE

Otherwise known as a Member of Congress. 

MEMBER OF CONGRESS

LOWEST FORM OF ANIMAL ON EARTH

Politician

 

HOW TO SAVE AMERICA

Defund Congress. 

OBAMA: BACK TO HIS ROOTS

SIGN OF THE TIMES

COMPLICIT IN OBAMA'S IRANIAN DEAL

DONALD SHUCK AND DUCK

MEALY-MOUTHED MICKEY MOUSE

HEIL HITLER

UP YOURS, AMERICA

OUR AMERICAN FASCISTS

AMERICANS OPPOSE IRANIAN NUCLEAR "DEAL"

SO, WHO CARES? 

MICHELLE CONTRIBUTES TO UNEMPLOYMENT AND STARVING KIDS

Tons of discarded food is being hauled from schools every day because children are refusing to eat Michelle's menu; half of cafeteria employees have been laid off.  The word is out: if you want better food, go to prison.