MORK THE DORK

I never really cared for his routines.  But, he was so well liked by so many people and he did establish his own genre.  In his own way, he was one of the greats. 

HORSE MANURE

The caballero who knew Hillary Clinton. 

AIR STRIKES

Obama ordered air strikes in Iraq over the weekend.  They were a resounding success; we took out two camels and a goat. 

Gosh, you don't suppose the Nobel Committee is going to be after Obama's Peace Prize, do you? 

SELF-DECEIVING

Getting on a jet plane to leave Washington D.C. for summer vacation thinking you've really earned your pay this year. 

CHANGE YOUR PASSWORDS

Recent major password hacks, totaling in the billions in just the last week, make it imperative that you change all of your sensitive passwords again.  For once, I think I can say that a major international disaster is NOT Obama's fault. 

IMPOTENCY

The inability of the President of the largest democracy in the free world to deal with even an honored ex-marine unjustifiably stuck in  Mexican jail. 

SILENCE

That wonderful sound you don't hear after all of the bullshitters leave Washington D.C. for the summer recess. 

JAMES BRADY

This may be a little insensitive, but I don't care.  James Brady was shot with a small .22 pistol; the shot was intended for President Reagan and was fired by a lunatic who was trying to get Jody Foster's attention.  Since then, Brady and his family have been on a relentless campaign to seize all of our guns, long or short.  Good riddance, sir. 

E.P.A.

Egotistical Presumptive Autocrats

BOOMING ECONOMY

The White House says the economy grew by 4% in the second quarter of 2014 in all 57 states. 

BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING BAD ABOUT OBAMA....

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes. 

CONGRESS IS GOING ON VACATION!

That means they're heading back to your neck of the woods.  Hold on to your watches and billfolds, and expect some big bombshells  before they get out of D.C. this afternoon! 

Gosh, you don't think Nancy Pelosi is pregnant, do you? 

MESSAGE FOR JOHN KERRY

A closed mouth gathers no foot. 

PELOSI SPEAKS OUT

"Hamas is a humanitarian organization." 

I'VE GOT NEWS FOR YOU, BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can know when he's really in trouble. 

WE'RE HAVING ANOTHER MEXICAN-AMERICAN WAR

This time, the Mexicans are winning. 

SHHH!!! DON'T TELL ANYONE!!!

My dog is an undocumented alien.  I just knew I should have insisted on papers... 

IF YOU CAN'T STAND THE HEAT, STAY OUT OF THE KITCHEN

The real reason Obama is on the road so much. 

SO, WHAT KIND OF GUY IS KERRY?

He always flies by night. 

BLINDERS

What is necessary for you to wear if you are going to work in Washington, D.C.