NEW YORK CITY INFESTED WITH BEDBUGS!!!

Limbaugh moves out!

THEO ALBRECHT DIES

I'd never heard of the guy either.  A German, at age 88 he was the Co-Owner of Trader Joe's and, with $16.7 billion, one of the wealthier people on the planet.   He is survived by his brother and partner, Karl, 90. 

OBAMA APPEARS ON "THE VIEW"

What's next?  Beavis and Butt-head? 

LOOKING FOR WORK?

There are two high-paid jobs available in Bell, California.....

TONY HAYWARD IS LEAVING

And going to work for Goldman Sachs? 

PROOF NANCY PELOSI IS NOT TWO-FACED

THE FASTEST WAY TO OBAMA'S HEART

Change your last name to Alinsky. 

WHO IS THE GREATEST SCREEN FACE SINCE CLARK GABLE?

Why Barrack Obama, of course.  Just ask him. 

NEW UNEMPLOYMENT CLAIMS RISE AGAIN

Don't worry about it.  Obama saved 89 million jobs last week. 

GEITHNER: ECONOMY IS WEAK

Well, don't worry about that, pal.  Just get your taxes done, okay? 

HEY THERE, SPORT!

How's that Hopey, Changie thing working out for you???????????

OBAMA'S NOSE GREW AGAIN YESTERDAY

He told the new Prime Minister that he is well on the way to reducing the American deficit by half.

I don't know what Obama smokes for sure, but I sure would like to try some.   

HOW TO CLEAN GULF SHORES

Remember that ad about "Ring Around the Collar?"  Just Wisk it away!

THE MUSLIMS WANT THEIR HOLIDAYS ON OUR CALENDAR

Why don't they get their own damned calendar? 

WITH ALL OF THE T.V. TIME OBAMA GETS...

I thought he'd be playing in the British Open. 

I'VE RECEIVED SO MANY DONATION REQUESTS THAT HAD A NICKEL IN THEM...

I can now afford to buy a yacht and retire. 

NAACP UPSET ABOUT TEA PARTIER'S USE OF WORD

They don't seem to like the use of the word "monkey" to describe President Obama. 

I agree.

"Baboon" is much more appropriate.  

WHERE'S AL GORE WHEN YOU NEED HIM?

He could have invented a way to stop the oil leak!

OBAMA SAYS HARRY REID'S AN ASSET

I wonder if he's the yankee or the yankor. 

STEINBRENNER

There he went, by George. 

A VERY SMALL CROWD

Number of Americans who want to have a beer with Obama. 

QUESTION OF THE WEEK

Did Eric Holder ever attend law school? 

PELOSI'S SOLUTION TO IMMINENT DEMOCRAT SLAUGHTER

More Town Hall Meetings.  For once, she has me licking my chops....

OBAMA, REID AND PELOSI

Three Dog Night. 

THE ONLY THING WORSE THAN HELL

Would be to get locked up into a room with three Dell Computer technical support people. 

NOW THAT LEVI HAS APOLOGIZED

Everything in Wasilla is finally okay again.... (Please pass the gray poop on)

NOW THAT LARRY KING IS LEAVING CNN...

Maybe CNN will hire Glenn Beck back? 

ARIZONA SHERIFF THREATENED BY MEXICAN DRUG CARTEL

Maybe, if they kill a Sheriff, Obama will send another 500 troops down there. 

NEW OIL SKIMMER

I wonder if it can slurp up stupid chairmen of national political parties....

IF WE SPEND ANOTHER $800 BILLION ON STIMULUS

We can kill another 3 million jobs and Hussein can SAVE another six million jobs and we'll all live happily ever after. 

OBAMA IS LIKE MERRILL LYNCH

When he speaks, the world listens... to another channel. 

OBAMA'S NEW IDEA ON IMMIGRATION REFORM

Put Jan Brewer in jail.