HEY, FATSO!

If you don't weigh within your allowed weight according to height, sex and age schedules, the Government is going to send you to the "fat farm" that they're going to establish at Guantanamo Bay after they free the terrorists. Instead of "Gitmo," the location will be known as "Fatmo."

They're also planning to levy a "Fat Tax" per pound overweight. Word has it, however, that they will allow you to subtract the weight of your sex organs, which explains why no Member of Congress will ever have to pay the Fat Tax.