NEW YEAR

Why is it that every new year in this country brings us the same old problems? 

THERE'S NO TRUTH TO THE RUMOR...

That Hillary Clinton and George H.W. Bush are holed up in a hotel room in downtown New York City. 

WHY IS IT...

That deaf people listen to what you are saying much more intently than people with perfectly good hearing? Is there any politician out there who can answer that question? 

PRICK

What they do to your finger when they want a quick blood test.  And you thought I was simply going to say, "Obama," didn't you? 

NOT TO WORRY

Thank God we don't have to worry about the "Fiscal Cliff," Iran, North Korea, Syria, Al Qaeda, Obama, Congress, or the IRS.  The world ended December 21st, remember? 

JACK KLUGMAN

A versatile actor has done his last scene. 

IT'S TRULY CHRISTMAS

Where I am on Saturday morning at 10:00 AM PST, the electricity has been off for ten hours.   Since my water comes from a well powered by electricity, I have no water and no stove.  My old desk top and my brand new desk top are both dark and silent.  My cell phone ran out of juice an hour ago and it's too dark to read.  The battery in this laptop will soon be dead. 


But, some things are good in life.  There's well over two feet of fresh snow on the ground and more coming; I couldn't get out of my driveway if I had to.  I can stand by the wood stove gazing out at the falling flakes while I contemplate breaking into the liquor cabinet or even popping some popcorn on that wood stove.  I'm so totally isolated; even Obama can't get to me. 


And so it is, my friends, that I sign off a day early for the Christmas holiday.  I'll be back on Wednesday the 26th, presuming that the electricity will be back on by then.  Cheers!

BAD MISTAKE

Thursday, I was bad-mouthing Obama because I knew that yesterday was going to be the end of the world.  Well, the end of the world didn't come and I now have a front yard full of Secret Service agents.  Maybe they'll go away if I send out a Columbian hooker...

MAYAN QUESTION

If the world ends before this day is over, who is going to take down the Christmas decorations? 

WHAT'S WORSE?

The 27 deaths in Newtown, or the horde of relentless, prodding reporters, photographers and cameramen sticking their lenses and microphones into every face, nook and cranny while all the town wants to do is to stop and take in what has happened and to start dealing with it? 

HOLY CELL PHONE, BATMAN!

Wouldn't it be nice if the President could ring everybody's cell phone in the entire country when he had something to say? 

ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE

The Republicans caused Hillary Clinton so much stress that she fainted and had a concussion, and now she can't testify about Benghazi. 

MIND BOGGLING QUESTION

Why does a Ford pickup with Virginia plates have a Confederate flag in its rear window? 

NEWTOWN, CONNECTICUT

MAY GOD BLESS THE VICTIMS, THEIR FAMILIES AND THE COMMUNITY. 

BLUE SHIELD TO RAISE PREMIUMS ANOTHER 20%

Don't you lost LOVE how ObamaCare is costing us less?  Didn't they just raise their rates 20% a few months ago? 

POWER

Only Obama has it. 

HOW CONGRESS SPENDS CHRISTMAS VACATION

http://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/b4_EdJ-XkUA?rel=0

TODAY IS UNLIKE ANY OTHER DAY

Today is 12-12-12.  Only nine days left until the end of the Mayan Calendar.  You know what THAT means?  There will never ever be a 13-13-13. 

TODAY'S LESSON IN LEADERSHIP

Egyptian President Mohammed Morsi has backed down when faced with a country full of citizens ticked off over his dictatorial leadership demands.  That's a lesson every leader should learn... correct Barry? 

NEW TV SCHEDULE

As long as Obama keeps running around acting like he's God on the face of the Earth, maybe he should confine his speeches to the Sunday morning church hour. 

JOHN MCAFEE ENTERS HOSPITAL

He has a bad virus...

PULLING THE OLD SWITCHEROO

Suppose Syria's Assad defects to Egypt and Egypt's Morsi defects to Syria? 

REMEMBER

PEARL HARBOR DAY

Our President did not duck out on that

9/11

Our President did not duck out on that

BUT AS FOR BENGHAZI

?

TWO TERMS

Let's limit all US politicians to two terms, One in office - One in prison.
Then Hang 'em!

"MAGIC BEANS AND FAIRY DUST"

What the White House "Carney" barker called the GOP budget plan.  Bow wow. 

SCHOOLS TO HAVE MORE HOURS

Several states are adding up to 300 hours to their school years on the basis that our students need to have a better education.  From what I've seen lately, the more schooling a guy has the dumber he is.  Take Harvard grad Barack Obama, for instance...

CAN YOU IMAGINE OBAMA ON ANOTHER PLANET?

You can't just keep banishing him from planet to planet.  One of these days, someone is going to have to stand up to him. 

BENGHAZI MOTTO

If you don't want them to know the facts, dazzle them with bullshit. 

IN JUST 20 MORE DAYS...

The Mayan Calendar will end, and you know what that means? 

No more mayanaise. 

PSORIASIS

Members of Congress and the White House, i.e.: "They are all psoriasis."  (Pronounced "sorry asses")